Investing In Yourself and Taking A Chance? - Alcoholics Question

 Investing In Yourself and Taking A Chance?

An Alcoholics Question

Well, for a quick recap for those that aren't aware, here is the situation summed up in a sentence or two. I'm an Alcoholic of 23 years (I'm 38), been on temporary unemployment for 2 months, and supposed to go back to work in 3 days.

Here is the situation, and I would love advice and comments! I really, really, would! I have been at a job for 4 years, that has never given me a single raise. It's a 10 month a year job (I live in a tourist town that shuts down for a couple months) that pays me 9 bucks an hour. During my layoff, my goal was to  make enough money restarting my computer business (I've made extra income off of this for years) to not go back to this dead end job. Well, it has been a success to some degree.. Yet, it hasn't been enough of a success to where I can just quit my "steady, yet shitty" paycheck.  The question is, have you ever taken a scary chance by investing in yourself? Should I (history of being a mess at times) go back to this dead end job, or should I work 15 hours a day getting my business profitable enough to be a success?

I know that if I'm spending 10 hours a day at my deadend job, I will never get past "just getting by".. Yet, it's scary when my computer business right now is only making about half of what I need to get by! BUT, I'm confident that 2 more months of "slave to the grind" work ethic will get me there!  I've already made up my mind, but I'm scared as hell. I suffer from alcoholism, and it gets in the way of my goals all too often. I'm risking security, to be a success at doing something that makes me happy. Should you be investing in yourself and taking a chance when you have a history of alcoholism, and screwing up? Well, it should be an interesting journey. I'll make my way to the local library to give updates if I have too! LOL...

People have cussed me out through email, called me weak, a coward........ basically for having an addiction. For you peeps, suck it! I don't care what you think. Many have given me constructive criticism which I really think about! Thank You!  You really help me.

I will be investing in myself and I will be taking a chance..  Whats the worst thing that could happen? Go back to being a poor ass alcoholic?  I'll take my chances. My dead end job doesn't bring any excitement to my soul. My home, self generated business does. When you have passion for something, you have incentive to meet your goal that won't fade in time. Pressure and time. There is nothing that can stop you if you apply pressure, and keep applying pressure for time!  Invest in yourself and take a chance. You can never fail if you try. It may not work out, but the only failures are the ones that don't try. Invest in yourself!